The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman
- Yenvy Truong
- 7 days ago
- 2 min read
As experienced through my own journey
This book was a stepping stone in how I came to understand love—not just in marriage, but in every relationship that matters.
Before I learned about love languages, I often felt disappointed or confused when the love I gave didn’t seem to land the way I expected. For me, quality time and acts of service are how I express love. I show up. I help. I spend time. I pour energy into doing things that make someone’s life easier or more meaningful. That’s love to me.
But when the people I cared about didn’t reciprocate in those same ways, I’d sometimes question—Do they care the same way I do? I wasn’t seeing love in their actions because I was looking for it in the way I give it.
That’s the heart of what The Five Love Languages reveals. Dr. Gary Chapman outlines five distinct ways people give and receive love:
Words of Affirmation – Verbal expressions of care, appreciation, or encouragement.
Acts of Service – Doing something helpful or thoughtful for the other person.
Receiving Gifts – Giving tangible tokens as expressions of thoughtfulness.
Quality Time – Being fully present and engaged with someone.
Physical Touch – Communicating affection through physical connection.
Each person has a dominant love language—or a blend—that makes them feel most valued. The disconnect happens when we express love in our language, but the person we love speaks a different one. Without realizing it, both people can feel unseen or unloved.
No one is wrong. No one is failing. There’s just a loss in translation.
This book helped me bridge that gap. It gave me permission to stop assuming and start asking. To say, “What makes you feel loved?” and listen closely. To stop giving love on autopilot and instead, give love in a way the other person actually receives.
Today, I try to meet people where they are, not where I wish they’d be. And in doing so, my relationships feel more grounded, more generous, and more whole.
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